Lovesick: Shadows of the Mind
by Axius27
Summary: When you love someone so much that you can't let them go, the only way forward is through blood... or insanity... Art on cover by Valeria San-Martin


Chapter 1: True Love

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The mid-spring sun hung low in the sky over Akademi high school. It was a late Wednesday afternoon, and the school was empty besides some of the faculty rounding off their work for the day, and the few students involved in after-school club activities. Other than those few, there was not a soul to be seen, especially on the upper levels.

The setup couldn't be more perfect.

On the rooftop of the prestigious academy, a monster lingered in the shadows. It had been there for some time, long before the arranged time, but it didn't want to waste a single second when it came to hunting its prey. Prey that was, by the way, running late. The monster was getting impatient. It had other things it wanted to do today, and if its prey didn't take the bait now, it'd have to rearrange the rest of the week around that failure. Very annoying.

The door to the rooftop creaked, and the monster's attention was quickly on it. A female student by the name of Kokona Haruka stepped out into the open air, glancing around and holding a pink note in her hand. Her purple hair was done up in drill curls, and she had a chest that made several girls her age jealous, though she probably considered the unwanted male attention it gathered more trouble than it was worth. A confused expression on her face, she checked the note and wandered over to the North-East corner, placing her bag down against the railing and sighing. The ideal spot, just as the monster had ordered.

The monster ran a hand through its hair. _Showtime_. It stepped out of the shadows and cleared it's throat. "You're late."

Kokona squeaked, quickly turning around. "Don't scare me like that, Aishi-san."

"You're still late." The monster replied. "I said 5:30. It's 5:43 now."

"Yeah, well, I couldn't get away from the cooking club any earlier." She eyed the monster. "So, I assume you're the one who wrote this note?"

"Naturally." It said, snatching the note from her hands and stuffing it back into its own pocket. "I need to talk to you, Haruka Kokona, and I can't allow our conversation to become the talk of the school. Once you hear what I have to say, you'll thank me for the discretion."

"Ok then…" Kokona said, frowning. "What's so secretive that you needed to call me up here? I have to get home, you know."

It gave her a menacing and knowing smile. "But you don't want to go home, do you? You're thankful for the delay."

Her reaction was subtle, but noticeable. "Wha… what are you-"

"I know." The monster felt a small amount of satisfaction as it watched Kokona's face drop. "I know about your father's behaviour and what he does to you when he's drunk."

Kokona went still as the seemingly normal illusion of her life was shattered. Tears welled in her eyes as her imagination ran wild, realising what this knowledge would do to her if it was made public, and exactly how much power the monster held over her now. Eventually, she choked out a response. "Ho…how?"

The monster tilted its head. "I overheard you telling Miyu Saki about it during lunch on Monday. Or at least, you tried to. It takes a lot of courage to tell someone about something like that Haruka-san, most people wouldn't even get as far as you did. Congratulations." The monster directed a hollow smile at Kokona, but it only served to make her more distraught. "After that, all I had to do is ask the right people. I still lack the details, of course, but I managed to paint a pretty clear picture of your situation."

"What do you want, Aishi-san?" Kokona asked quietly. "Are you going to blackmail me?"

It shrugged. "Perhaps. It depends, I guess."

"Depends on what?!" Kokona yelled, tears now flowing down her face. The monster looked her straight in the eye, something it had been told was the best way to get a point across.

"Do you want me to?"

Her confusion was clear. "Huh? What do you-"

"I could very easily tell the whole school, if I so wished, but I'm not so heartless to ruin your life without your consent." It replied. "I want to help you."

"I… I don't understand."

"Listen, if you want to pay me for my silence or do something ridiculous for me as a favour so all this goes away, that's fine. But I'm here, offering the hand of friendship to you as well." It gave her a hollow smile. "I'm willing to help you overcome this nightmare you're stuck in, if that's what you want."

"Aishi-san, I-"

The monster interrupted her with a dismissive wave. "Oh please, Aishi-san is what people call my mother. How about you call me Ayano, and I'll call you Kokona, ok?"

"Um… ok…" Kokona was obviously uncomfortable with the sudden casualness of the conversation. "Ayano, I don't know what you're trying to say. Why would you want to help me? Why would anyone want to help me?"

"Because I think I can." Time for the selling point. "I used to see life as a bland, colourless existence, then something incredible happened, and I found meaning in it all. I want to help you by showing you exactly what I found."

"And what's that?"

"Love." The monster said simply. "I fell in love."

Kokona looked at the monster, her glistening tears drying on her confused face. "You… fell in love?"

"Yep. I was running down the street back in March and crashed straight into _him_. My _Senpai_." The monster spun around, feeling its heart skip a beat as it said the honorific title. "I fell in love right at that moment. It was like my entire body was ablaze, like I was seeing everything in a new light. I'd never felt like that before."

Kokona stared at it for a few seconds. "I… wow… Ayano, no one ever mentioned that you had found someone special. I've never seen you so… passionate."

"I doubt anyone has, Kokona-san. Not even my parents know about this." The monster briefly wondered how its parent's trip to America was going.

"That's all good and nice for you… but how is that supposed to help me?"

It turned back to her, suddenly brought out of its respite. "Obviously, my love can't help you. It's for me and Senpai alone. But I can still help you find love."

She shook her head. "That's impossible. Ever since my mom died, my dad… he…" Her words caught in her throat. "What boy would want to love me, knowing what I am, what's been done to me?"

"Does that matter?" The monster asked. "I'm not talking about everyday, run-of-the-mill high school love here; I'm talking about _true love_."

Kokona frowned. "True love?"

"What other kind would I be talking about? If true love can conquers all boundaries, end wars and save the day, it can get past a little thing like domestic abuse." Kokona flinched, and the monster threw a hand over its face. "Sorry, I forgot for a second how sensitive the issue is."

She clutched her forehead. "No, no you don't understand. If you truly knew what my dad does to me, you'd-"

"If your love knowing is so much of an issue, just don't tell him. Every girl has to have a few secrets; yours is just a little bigger than the usual variety."

"But-"

"Hey, you're not alone. I have secrets that I can never tell my Senpai, like how my mom can be a complete nutjob sometimes or how father is never happy when he comes home."

Kokona shook her head. "I don't know..."

"Alright then, if you don't want love we'll go with the payment option." The monster said. "My silence costs 8 billion Yen."

Kokona's eyes widened at the ridiculous sum, then she bowed her head. "I'm afraid to ask what the favour is."

The monster grinned; an unnatural expression for it. "It's to ask a random boy out on a date."

Kokona rolled her eyes. "Fine. You win, Ayano. What do I have to do?"

"For now, stop thinking about all the troubles and horrors of your life. Relax." The monster said in a soothing voice, it's train of thought touching on the fact it was doing quite a good job at tricking Kokona Haruka, despite never once feeling any kind of sympathy for the fool. "Do you know the myth surrounding The Cherry Tree?"

"The one about confessing your feelings under it on a Friday will guarantee your love to be accepted?"

"Correct. Think about the tree. In fact, this is the perfect spot to view it. Look at it now." Kokona obeyed, leaning over the railing slightly as she gazed out towards the hill behind the school building. On its peak sat the fabled Sakura Tree, its pink leaves almost glowing in the orange light. "Now, think of someone you love, or loved. A close friend, a family member, anyone who left an emptiness behind when they left. Do you have someone?"

"Yes." Kokona breathed, eyes closed.

"Who?"

"My… mom… before..." She let out a choked sob.

"Perfect. Now imagine the times before her death, the times before your father became what he is, the times where you could truly be happy. Envision the memory in your mind, and grasp the emotions within. Have you done that?"

A tear ran down Kokona's cheek as she nodded, adding to the stains already there. "I had no idea I could still feel like this, that I could still feel… happy."

"Good. Now search your mind. Is there _anyone_ who makes you feel the same way? Anyone at all?"

Kokona was silent for several seconds, before responding. "Yes."

The monster wrapped an arm around her back. "What is their name?"

More silence. Then. "Taro."

"Yamada-san? From class 3-2?"

Kokona nodded. "He's the only one that makes me feel alive. It's… it's like I've always known, but I only just realised." More tears rolled down her cheeks. "Thank you, Ayano."

"Huh. I can understand that. Yamada-san is an amazing person." A pause. "But you can't have him." Kokona frowned slightly, the sudden hardness in the monster's voice dragging her out of her daze. "He's _mine!_ "

The monster suddenly shoved Kokona forward, forcing her upper body well over the railing. Before she could react, it grabbed her ankles and flipped her over the edge, yanking off her shoes as she slipped past. She barely had time to scream before simple physics brought her crashing down onto the hard ground below.

There was a sickening crunch, and Kokona Haruka died.

The monster stole a quick glance at the messy scene three storeys down, then carefully placed the deceased girl's shoes where she had been standing a moment before. Pulling a pad of paper out of Kokona's bag, it quickly wrote out a short message in her handwriting.

 _Saki knows my secret.  
I can't trust her to stay silent about this, how long until everyone knows as well?  
Better to get away from it all, to end it all._

 _I_ _'_ _m coming, mom._

It placed the fake suicide note by her shoes, tucking it underneath them so the wind didn't blow it away. It'd be so frustrating to needlessly stall the police investigation simply because it had been careless with evidence. Reaching into its pocket, it felt the threatening note it had put in Kokona's locker during lunch. There wasn't enough information on it to link it to the monster, but if left alone, it would throw the suicide note under suspicion. Oh well, it was nothing a quick trip to the girl's bathroom couldn't fix. With that gone, the suicide note alongside the dried tears on Kokona's face should be more than enough to bring the investigation to a swift end.

Satisfied with the state of the crime scene it had left behind, the monster walked through the doors to the stairwell and left the roof. It allowed itself to feel a measure of happiness at what it had achieved. Once again, Info-chan had given it reliable intel, and allowed it to confirm and take out a threat before Kokona had a chance to fully realise her feelings towards Senpai. It had been risky, alerting her to those dormant emotions that she held deep within, but it was still early days, and the monster still didn't fully trust the faceless girl behind it's smartphone screen. Besides, if Info-chan had been wrong, then all that would have happened was the awakening of a young girl from a nightmarish situation. Win-win either way.

The monster froze. Speaking of Info-chan, according to her information, a teacher should be rounding the corner behind it right… about…

"Aishi Ayano, what are you still doing here?" Came the authoritarian voice.

The monster spun around. "I'm so sorry Risa-Sensei. I was grabbing stuff from the art room and didn't realise how late it was."

Risa folded her arms. "Well, hurry up and leave. I've finished my rounds and I'm locking the place up."

"Right away, Sensei!" The monster turned to leave, then looked back. "Oh, would you mind telling me the time, Sensei? My phone's clock is bugging out again."

"Of course. You should really get that thing fixed, Aishi-san." Risa checked her watch. "It's 5:55 exactly."

The monster bowed respectfully. "Thanks Sensei!"

Once the monster was out of sight, it pulled its smartphone out of its pocket. Opening the app made specifically for discrete messaging, it shot off the time to Info-chan. Seconds later, the reply came. _'Noted. Once the report is filed, I'll make the necessary amendments. We'll talk more tonight. Later, Yan-chan.'_

The monster smiled to itself at the elegance of the plan. On the chance that the corrupt headmistress couldn't end the investigation at a simple suicide, now the autopsy report would say that Kokona threw herself off the roof while it was talking to Risa-Sensei. The perfect alibi, for the perfect murder. Now, once again, Senpai was safely within _her_ grasp.

The monster that was the sixteen year old schoolgirl Ayano Aishi ran out the main entrance. If she hurried, maybe she could catch up to Senpai and insure that no more threats to their true love would emerge today. And if any did… well… she could afford to stall going home a little longer.

After all, nothing is more important than Senpai.

* * *

 **A/N: Welcome to the dark corners of my mind, MUHAHAHA!**

 **This is something I started writing during a lunch break to pass the time, and I ended up finishing it the same day. I wrote this ridiculously fast, and it seems to have not dropped in quality, so that's a plus. This isn't all I'm going to write, I want to do a lot more with this. This story has been in planning stages ever since the 2015 halloween update, and I will confess, "Test Subject One: Ransom" was practice for some of the later scenes. I wanted experience in making seemingly nice characters evil, and Atomyst's story suited my needs perfectly. (by the way, if you haven't read PK Atomyst's "Homura Akemi: Test Subject One" or my spinoff "Test Subject One: Ransom" yet, you should :D )**


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